Charlotte Foust
cfoust at infostatsystems.com
Fri Oct 20 13:41:14 CDT 2006
Well *I* knew what I meant! LOL Charlotte -----Original Message----- From: accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com [mailto:accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com] On Behalf Of Mark A Matte Sent: Friday, October 20, 2006 11:27 AM To: accessd at databaseadvisors.com Subject: Re: [AccessD] OT: Friday Humor Haven't had to use Webster's in awhile...thanks Charlotte...lol. Thanks, Mark A. Matte P.S...Webster says 'apocryphal' instead of 'apochryphal '...but either way I agree with you Charlotte >From: "Charlotte Foust" <cfoust at infostatsystems.com> >Reply-To: Access Developers discussion and problem >solving<accessd at databaseadvisors.com> >To: "Access Developers discussion and problem >solving"<accessd at databaseadvisors.com> >Subject: Re: [AccessD] OT: Friday Humor >Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2006 09:24:11 -0700 > >I sure it's apochryphal but it's fun anyhow! > >Charlotte Foust > >-----Original Message----- >From: accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com >[mailto:accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com] On Behalf Of >kens.programming >Sent: Friday, October 20, 2006 9:24 AM >To: 'Access Developers discussion and problem solving' >Subject: Re: [AccessD] OT: Friday Humor > >That is great. Makes me happy to be a WSU alumnus. Thanks for sharing. > >Ken > >-----Original Message----- >From: accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com >[mailto:accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com] On Behalf Of Hale, Jim >Sent: Friday, October 20, 2006 6:46 AM >To: 'Accessd (E-mail) >Subject: [AccessD] OT: Friday Humor > >HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT > >The following is an actual question given on a Washington State >University chemistry mid-term. >The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it >with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have >the pleasure of enjoying it as well : > >Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic >(absorbs heat)? > >Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law >(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some >variant . > >One student, however, wrote the following: > >First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we >need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate >at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a >soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. >As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different >religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state >that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. >Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not >belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to >Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number >of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. >Now, we look at the Rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's >Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to >stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls >are added. > >This gives two possibilities: > >1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls >enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase >until all Hell breaks loose. > >2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in >Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes >over. > >So which is it? > >If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year >that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take >into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two >must be true, AND thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already >frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen >over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is >therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the >existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept >shouting "Oh my God." > >THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A" > > > >*********************************************************************** >The information transmitted is intended solely for the individual or >entity to which it is addressed and may contain confidential and/or >privileged material. Any review, retransmission, dissemination or other >use of or taking action in reliance upon this information by persons or >entities other than the intended recipient is prohibited. >If you have received this email in error please contact the sender and >delete the material from any computer. 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