[AccessD] OT: Friday (humour)

Shamil Salakhetdinov shamil at users.mns.ru
Fri Apr 13 11:57:47 CDT 2007


Hi Gustav,

It's Friday, the *13th* today. Everybody are fighting with *malicious* alien
software?

My 0.02 kopeks for Friday humor - the following is a translated from Russian
anecdote:

Here is what we learn from the Hollywood films:
1. During any kind of investigation a policemen at least one time visits a
strip-club. 
2. Foreigners prefer to speak English even if they talk to each other.
3. To rescue from a pursuit it is always possible to hide in a crowd of a
passing by parade. For sure there will be suitable parade to do that 
4. On every bed there is an L-shaped blanket closing a man up to a belt, and
a woman - up to a chin. 
5. The best detective is always discharged of work or he/she is given 48
hours to finish investigation. 
6. Everyone can land a plane.
7. A ventilation system of any building is the best place to hide, nobody
will try to search for you there you there, but using it you can reach any
part of a building. 
8. Tour Eiffel in Paris is visible from EACH window. 
9. Any bomb with clockwork is additionally equipped by the indicator with
large red figures for everybody to see what time remains before explosion. 
10. It's not necessary for Nazis officers to know German language, it is
enough for them to speak English with German accent.
11. There is no illumination system in kitchens. To get a light in kitchen
at night time it is enough to open a door of a refrigerator. 
12. Having remained alone to spend the night in a dark and gloomy building
and having heard a suspicious sound, the heroine(actress) goes to check what
is happening, having put on her most magnificent and seductive linen. 
13. Collided cars always blow up and burn. 
14. Medieval and even primitive inhabitants always have shining, magnificent
hair and magnificent teeth. 
15. If you have got surrounded by more than one opponent, there anyway will
be just one attacking you, and the others at this time will be making
menacing body movements. 
16. Even if a car goes on a flat and a straight road, the steering wheel has
to be twisted furiously here and there. 
17. Any lock can be opened by a paper clip, hairpin or a credit card.
Exception is the case when a fire begins in the house where a small child is
locked. 
18. Lipstick is not getting erased, even if a heroine (actress) takes a
shower or dives with an aqualung.

--
Shamil
 
-----Original Message-----
From: accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com
[mailto:accessd-bounces at databaseadvisors.com] On Behalf Of Gustav Brock
Sent: Friday, April 13, 2007 5:36 PM
To: accessd at databaseadvisors.com
Subject: [AccessD] OT: Friday (humour)
Importance: Low

** Low Priority **

Hi all, quiet day again.

A good marriage lasts forever - a bad marriage feels so.

/gustav


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