[AccessD] One-to-Many Relationship

Good Afternoon,
 
In Access 2007 I have a split database the table are held in a dat database and the application is in the app database with has linked tables to the dat database.  Usually this is not an issue.  Today, when I create a relationship in the dat database everything is fine.  I can connect the table with the fields and check enforce refential integrity and cascase update realated fields check boxes.  However, if I don't do it in the dat, when I go to make the save relationship in the app database these checkboxes are grayed out.  I have delete the linked tables ane reattched them but sill have this strange behavor.  
 
Have anyone seen this before?
 
thanks!
 
Dale