Oleg_123 at xuppa.com
Oleg_123 at xuppa.com
Fri Feb 14 10:40:00 CST 2003
I was laughing so hard, I startled the Secretary who came to water the plants... (so she dropped the cup and spilled the water) :)) > Ditto for us Coloradoans. > > Jeff > > -------Original Message------- > From: "Klos, Susan" <Susan.Klos at fldoe.org> > Sent: 02/14/03 09:25 AM > To: "'accessd at databaseadvisors.com'" <accessd at databaseadvisors.com> > Subject: RE: [AccessD] OT Humor: You Might be from Kansas If... > >> >> These are great, Seth! I am from Oklahoma (no! not OU the other >> school. > Do > most people know there is another one?) and understood all of them. > Many apply to Oklahomans (some with slight changes). > > -----Original Message----- > From: Seth Galitzer [mailto:sgsax at ksu.edu] > Sent: Friday, February 14, 2003 11:10 AM > To: accessd > Subject: [AccessD] OT Humor: You Might be from Kansas If... > > > OK, being the resident Kansan here (or at least one of the few), I think > I am qualified to post this. Some are just plain stereotypes, but > others are very true... > > Happy Friday! > > Seth > > ------------------------------------- > > You Might be from Kansas If... > > 1. You no longer associate bridges or rivers with water. > > 2. You have never met any celebrities. (Bob Dole isn't a celebrity; he's > your neighbor.) > > 3. You know the meaning of Rock Chalk Jayhawk. > > 4. Your closest neighbor is more than a mile away and you can still see > him from your front porch. > > 5. You can properly pronounce Salina, Basehor, Cimmeron, Schoenchen, > Kechi and Osawatomie. > > 6. Going on vacation means going to Hutch to the fair or to Abilene to > Ike's museum > > 7. A traffic jam involves two cars staring each other down at a four-way > stop, each determined to be the most polite and let the other go first. > > 8. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Ford F10 4x4 is.(Except in > Johnson County) > > 9. You discover that in July it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car. > > 10. The terms Sooners and Huskers cause hairs on the back of your neck > to stand up straight and your blood pressure to rise. > > 11. You have owned at least one belt buckle bigger than your fist. > > 12. You think people who complain about the wind and weather in their > states are SISSIES! > > 13. You are not surprised to find movie rentals, ammunition and bait all > in the same store. > > 14. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by > the distance to the door but by the availability of shade. > > 15. You have been asked, "Where is Toto" more than once. > > 16. You had at least one summer job that was bucking bales or custom > cutting. > > 17. More than once you've made a beer run to another state. > > 18. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned to multiply. > > 19. Your school classes have been canceled because of the cold. > > 20. You know in your heart that K-State can beat Oklahoma in football. > > 21. Traffic congestion is ten cars waiting to pass a combine on the hig > hway. > > 22. You have had to switch from heat to A/C in the same day. > > 23. You know everything goes better with Ranch. > > 24. Your school classes have been canceled because of the heat. > > 25. You have ridden the school bus for more than an hour each way. > > 26. In August, you break a sweat the instant you step outside at > 7:00a.m. > > 27. You instantly know someone is from Johnson County when they call > everything west of Topeka... "Western" Kansas. > > 28. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and > look for a funnel. > > 29. You know the real way to pronounce the name of Clinton's state and > the river... arKANSAS. > > 30. You think the opening day of pheasant season is a national holiday. > > 31. "Vacation" means going to Kansas City or Wichita for the weekend. > > 32. You measure distance in hours. > > 33. You know several people who have hit more than one deer. > > 34. You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events. > > 35. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both > unlocked. > > 36. You think of the major food groups as beer, beef and beans. > > 37. You carry jumper cables in your car and make sure your better half > knows how to use them. > > 38. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit. > > 39. You know the 4 seasons as: summer, road construction, still summer, > winter. > > 40. It takes you 3 hours to go to the store for one item even when > you're in a rush because you have to stop and talk to everyone in town. > > 41. You lock the doors to your truck but leave the windows rolled down. > > 42. You call sodas just plain ol' "Pop"!! > > 43. FINALLY..... you are 100% Kansan if........... You actually > understand these jokes and forward them to all your friends from Kansas. > > -- > Seth Galitzer sgsax at ksu.edu > Computing Specialist http://puma.agron.ksu.edu/~sgsax > Dept. of Plant Pathology > Kansas State University > > _______________________________________________ > AccessD mailing list > AccessD at databaseadvisors.com > http://databaseadvisors.com/mailman/listinfo/accessd > Website: http://www.databaseadvisors.com > _______________________________________________ > AccessD mailing list > AccessD at databaseadvisors.com > http://databaseadvisors.com/mailman/listinfo/accessd > Website: http://www.databaseadvisors.com >> > _______________________________________________ > AccessD mailing list > AccessD at databaseadvisors.com > http://databaseadvisors.com/mailman/listinfo/accessd > Website: http://www.databaseadvisors.com ----------------------------------------- Send a Xuppa Valentine to Your Sweetheart today! http://www.xuppa.com/greet/