[AccessD] OT: Humor

The Spoiled Under 30 Crowd 

If you are over 30, you will think this is hilarious!!!! Send it to your
kids, they may not think so!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious
diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with
walking twenty-five miles to school every morning .... Uphill BOTH ways ..
Yadda, yadda, yadda

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in
heck I was going to lay a bunch of malarkey like that on kids about how hard
I had it and how easy they've got it! 

But now that...

I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice
the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood,
you live in a dang Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today, you
don't know how good you've got it!

1. When I was a kid, we didn't have the Internet. If we wanted to know
something, we had to go to the dang library and look it up ourselves... In
the card catalog!! (Do you even know what a card catalog is? Didn't think
so!)

2. There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter... With a
pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the
mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!

3. There were no MP3's or Napsters! If you wanted to steal music, you had to
hitchhike to the dang record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to
wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk
over the beginning and mess it all up!

4. We didn't have fancy stuff like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone
and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! 

5. And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had
no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, a friend,
a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take
your chances, mister! 

6. We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like "Space
Invaders" and "asteroids" and the graphics were horrible! Your guy was a
little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were no
multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could
never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and
faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

7. When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium
seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad
with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just out of
luck!

8. Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15
channels and there was no onscreen menu! You had to use a little book called
a TV Guide to find out what was on!

And there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on
Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for
cartoons! 

9. And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up, we had
to use the stove or go build a fire ... Imagine that! If we wanted popcorn,
we had to use that stupid JiffyPop thing or a pan with HOT oil and Real
popcorn kernels and shake it all over the stove forever like an idiot. 

10. When we were on the phone with our friends and our parents walked-in, we
were stuck to the wall with a cord, a 7 foot cord that ran to the phone -
not the phone base, the actual phone. You couldn't walk outside so your mom
couldn't hear. We barely had enough length to sit on the floor and still be
able to twirl the phone cord in our fingers. If you suddenly had to go to
the bathroom - guess what we had to do..... Hang up and talk to them later.

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy.
You're spoiled!!

You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980! 

Regards,
The over 30 Crowd

John W. Colby
Colby Consulting
www.ColbyConsulting.com