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john.k.serrano at gmail.com
Mon Nov 1 12:13:38 CDT 2010
You do know this joke never really happened? You can check http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/autos.asp On Sun, Oct 31, 2010 at 11:43 AM, Rocky Smolin <rockysmolin at bchacc.com>wrote: > > An oldie - but still...somehow...current... > > R > > > > For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for > the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. > > At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly > compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, > > 'If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, > we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.' > > In response to Bill ' s comments, General Motors issued a press > release stating: > > If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be > driving cars with the following characteristics: > > 1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash.........Twice a > day. > > 2.. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have > to buy a new car. > > 3... Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. > You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, > shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could > continue. For some reason you would simply accept this. > > 4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would > cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would > have to reinstall the engine. > > 5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was > reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on > only five percent of the roads. > > 6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would > all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation' > warning light. > > 7. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying. > > 8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you > out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door > handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna. > > 9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to > learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would > operate in the same manner as the old car. > > 10. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine > off. > > 11. When all else fails, you call 'customer service ' in some > foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how to fix your > car yourself!!!! > > > -- > AccessD mailing list > AccessD at databaseadvisors.com > http://databaseadvisors.com/mailman/listinfo/accessd > Website: http://www.databaseadvisors.com > -- John Serrano